#it hurts. like it genuinely hurt to read this i couldnt even look at him this morning i had to stop drawing and step away for a few hours.

[jd-loves-fiction]

Sorry, two requests in one go but I NEED TO GET THIS OFF MY SYSTEM OR I FORGET

Same platonic dynamic with Boothill, Welt, Jing Yuan and Blade with reader who turned into a small child all of a sudden (around 2-3 years old, so toddler)

🌑 RAAHHH FEED ME (I couldnt resist the angst sowy :)) Also am I crazy or do they all give girl dad... they all feel like girl dad's to me, expect maybe Jing Yuan 😅

✦ 𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐥 ✦

Possibly the most experienced in this field actually???

Not to remind y'all of the absolute angst of his backstory, but he adopted a little kid in the past so... he's actually pretty knowledgeable when it comes to kids

Doesnt make this smooth sailing tho

Firstly, he's super confused on how this happened and how to undo it - spends so much time stressing about it that he almost forgets he has to take care of you now until you start screaming

Now that he's looking at you, oh you're so cute it should be illegal

Cuteness aggression to the max with the most self-restraint a man could possibly have (knowing he could easily seriously hurt you)

Once he accepts that his only option is waiting it out, he's focusing on making sure you're comfy

Surprisingly very in tune with your wants and needs

Overall, you'll be well taken care of with him, though the moment you're soundly asleep, memories of the past come back to haunt him, reminding him of all he lost

Though he reasons with himself that the past has passed and all he can do is keep going without letting it drag him down

And you're helping him do just that ❤️

✦ 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐭 ✦

Utterly confounded

Mostly just curious

How did this happen? Do you still have your memories? Did your brain also revert back?

But he also cant deny how freaking cute you are🥺

Very gentle, holding you close, whispering softly even if you're screaming - makes you sleepy immediately

If you start screaming incoherently he's gonna have a hard time figuring out what you need but will try his best and remain calm the whole time

Does anything you want him to, literally

Want to play dolls? He's making a cute voice and everything. Want him to read to you? Putting on the softest tone known to man and putting you to sleep before you're through the first page

This also applies to food - whatever you want to eat, he's letting you, since he knows this situation must be pretty stressful and he doesnt want you start screaming at him :(

Once it's over he probably wont mention it again to you in case you think it's embarrassing, but will keep the sweet memory close to his heart - it makes him feel fuzzy to think he could take care of you when you're so vulnerable

Also you're just so damn cute, he cant get over it 😭

✦ 𝐉𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐘𝐮𝐚𝐧 ✦

Give him a second he's gonna have to laugh about this for a while

Decent experience with teens and older children because of Yanqing and other students he's trained, but toddlers?

No clue, he's so lost

Genuinely tries to apply lion cub logic

It's the closest experience he's had to raising a kid ok?! He's trying 🥺

Probably ends up getting yelled at by Yanqing because no, human children do not work in any way similarly to lion cubs >:(

After that he's trying a little harder

He's surrounded by people who know more than him on this so he's putting you on his hip and carrying you around while he asks them what to do

Comes back to his office after and puts you down, not realizing that you're crawling over to Mimi

Nearly has a heart attack once he does realize but it's all good, Mimi's a good boy and just naps while you play with his mane

He was honestly ready to use you as an excuse to not do this work and seeing you napping with Mimi just solidifies it for him

The next time Yanqing comes by to make sure you're ok, he finds you all cuddled up on Mimi, so he leaves with a fond sigh

Jing yuan was totally awake btw

✦ 𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐝𝐞 ✦

Oh sweet god he is not equipped for this AT ALL

Immediatly running to Kafka or Firefly for help (Silver Wolf is suddenly not so mysteriously absent) and they are somehow even less helpful than he is

Grumbling the whole time but does try his best to care for you

Does NOT know why you're screaming pls stop 😭

Has a surprising among of patience - he knows what children are like, so he's not blaming you for anything you do or losing it on you

He's good at keeping himself calm when the situation doesnt require him to lose his shit

Excels at... napping :)

Honest to god cant think of much else to do with you besides putting a sword in your hand, which both Kafka and Firefly scold for even thinking about

Cant really blame him, that's what his parents did and he turned out just fine :) (Note the sarcasm)

Something in his cold (literally) dead heart warms at the sight of you fumbling about and smiling sweetly at him

He never thought himself particularly inviting but he sure doesnt mind that you think so

The whole situation has him pondering his past but most of all, his humanity - what he lost of it and what he still has

[mierulii]

Cyrus...

I'm at a loss for words. You poor soul.

[sturniolo04]

No Nut November M.S.

Bf!Matt x Gf!Fem!Reader

A/N: If you don't like the preadded name in my stories, you can either add your own name or not read it; it's up to you :)

A/n: in honor of it being November 30 we’re not gonna talk about how I’m late to the party!

dividers: @bernardsbendystraws

You and matt knew this was coming. you guys do it you every year and every year you two never get through the 30 days. Which brings you to now, November 1st.

"baby we have to make it the full 30 this year"

matt groans out to you as you are leaning on your tippy toes hugging him as he allows his palms to rest on your ass. The first not so smart move he made

"hey thats not my fault you couldnt keep it in your pants on day 26"

you retaliate as you huff out leaning your head back as matt rolls his eyes at the memory.

" okay yeah i know but seriously this year because the last thing I need is for Chris to rub it in my face that he has more self control sexually than me with Brynn"

he groans out as you giggle at his reaction.

"baby what do yu think of this outfit"

you state as you let in into the dressing room with you after putting on the outfit.

"it looks good"

matt simply states back to you admiring you as you check yourself out in the dressing room mirror. Matt had been already genuinely struggling with this whole no sex , no getting himself off even thing for the whole month, why? Simple he has a girlfriend that he cant keep his hands off of and keeping his hands off has proven to be his downfall each year.

"c'mere"

matt simply states needing something to relieve the pressure that he knew was building up. You turn to look at him as he carefully grabs your hand and pulls you over to him as you sit down on his lap, not thinking too much of it because he is your boyfriend right

"Matthewww"

you gasp quietly not trying to be too loud since you two were in the dressing room still. Looking at him giggling you ultimately feeling the problem.

"i knoww"

he groans out allowing his head to lean against the wall. of the dressing room.

"its only day 15 babe come on get up"

you giggle standing up off of his lap as he quickly places his hands over his lap.

"in a minute i have to wait for this to go away"

he groans out with his head still leaning back fluttering his eyes closed.

"how long is that going to take we are in the dressing room and we have to go home"

you ask knowing it takes him and his friend a good 20 minutes to get it together.

"i dont know it's starting to hurt"

he huffs out exhaling deeply looking up at you.

"just tuck it or something"

you giggle at yourself even having to say that sentence to him as he complies.

"Babyy go put some pants on"

you whine out realizing he must have taken his pajama pants off in the middle of the night probably getting hot to be only left in his calvin kleins. You were starting to feel on edge already which you tend to be in the morning.

"why"

matt smirks knowing exactly why as he begins to stretch to go take a shower.

"dude seriously the fuck you mean why"

you whine out.

"babe im going to take a shower so I don't need them on and I'm eventually not going to need these on either"

matt states referring to his underwear as your face flushes with a shade of pink as the mental image you just got immediately reaching for the pillow you were laying on screaming into it.

"Dude you need to handle that"

chris chuckles as matt finally makes his way out from his room only dressed in freshlove sweatpants.

"i cant"

matt huffs out looking down to see the problem area running a frustrated hand through his messy bed head from his nap.

" im fully convinced you get horny every hour of the day"

chris chuckles seeming to not have the same struggle as his older brother.

"well no shit dumb ass you and brynn like never made it to that base yet"

matt huffs crossing his arms.

"Matt Chris"

you shout coming downstairs from Nick's room running up to matt and jumping up in his arms.

"hey my love"

matt greets you as he catches you his palms landing on your ass as you were clothed in navy blue nike pro shorts and the corresponding fresh love hoodie that you swiped from him that match the sweatpants he was currently wearing.

" what are you guys talking about"

you question the pair as you rest your head on matt's shoulder.

"oh nothing just how your boyfriend gets horny every single hour of everyday"

chris laughs out as you look at matt with his check flushed with a deep shade of pink.

"shut the fuck up"

matt groans out as he leans down with you still in his arms.

"dont drop me"

you squeal out tightening your grip around his neck

“God i would never’

Matt groans out as your ass slightly rubs up against him.

“Oh my goodness Matthew”

You giggle leaning you head in the crook of his neck leaving a loving kiss on his shoulder.

“What movie are we watching love birds”

Nick asks as you all are in the living room having your normal Friday movie night.

“I have no clue we could watch back to the future or something”

Chris suggests as brynn his girlfriend sits down next to him with their designated blanket.

“That’s fine with me where is your lover”

Nick chuckles asking Matt.

“Right here I had to change into comfortable clothes”

You states sighing you walk into the common space closing the bathroom door behind you as you begin to walk over in your pajama shorts to take your spot next to your boyfriend on the couch.

“Do we need a blanket”

You ask Matt softly as he places a loving grip on you bare thigh as Nick and Chris bicker about what movie we should watch tonight. Matt secretly loves that you decided to wear your pajama shorts already feeling the sudden tightness in his plaid pajama pants from how perfect the bottoms showcase, your hips and ass.

“ baby’

You question him again when you didn’t get a response. Matt quickly shifts his gaze towards you to make eye contact snapping him out of what it looked like a moment of deep thought from what you could read from his given facial expression.

“ you Okay”

You  ask as he lets out a deep sigh. Matt, finally, giving up and beginning to act on his intrusive thoughts, stand up from the couch, grabbing you by the waist and throwing you over his shoulder with his tattooed, arms tightly gripping your thighs 

“ Matthewww where are we going”

You squeal out from the sudden action Play fully kicking your feet 

“ chris’ you win I give up “

Matt quickly rushes out as he begins to walk towards his in your shared bedroom in the house. it was safe to say that you two decided not to put yourself through the November challenge ever again 

Taglist

@mintsturniolo @wh0resstuff @emely9274 @ksturnz @spicymuffins03 @dirtylittleheart333 @stayingstromboli

[ii-meeple-confessions]

I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT THIS SO IM PUTTING IT HERE UGHHH: So. In Season 3 (and kind of in late season 2) (and just in general actually) Mephone showcases a lot of self-deprecating habits, making jokes at his expense, and. The thing that gets me the most is. He genuinely believes he can't make good art.

LIKE. Okay, take the HUGE twist into account of Mephone creating the contestants and everything on the show essentially... And then look at, for example, S3 E9 "Title TBD" where one of the biggest points of the video is that Machines (AI) don't usually make the best art....... Like, both of the movies that each team made using the Animation Machine turned out horribly. Why, Mephone? Is this subconscious shitting on yourself?!??!?!?!?? IM SORRY?? "AI cant make good art" and the robot that made the entire show is AI. IGNORING BOT'S PRESENCE HERE TOO. (they also call it a 'nightmare fuel generator' sorry mephone i think that reflects on you too)

Also... The entirety of S3 E17 "The Show Must Go On" oh my GOD... He talks about how much time and effort and care he puts into his episodes, and visibly when he tries to rush it and force his contestants to make a TON of episodes in 5 hours it uh. Doesn't go to plan. And during it he literally asks them, "Will you miss your time on this show?" And. No one. Responds. Another moment is when Balloon says "Theres a fine line between engaging entertainment and commodified content consumed by customers, and I think you've just crossed it, Mephone!" And the.... the meeple parallels... ouch. How Mephone is straying into the same waters Meeple does, by rushing things out and not caring for the quality of the craft............ The future is so yesterday, isn't it?

Also walkie talkie..... walkie talkieeee "We don't NEED writers OR contestants! We just need REVOLUTIONARY TECHOLOGY!" I feel like. All of this is, in retrospect, mephone wondering if his own art is good enough and debating on if technology even can make good art. I imagine cobs wasn't so supportive of his creative endevours back at Meeple, Maybe, at some point, Mephone heard that same sentiment... from cobs. Ouch.

But the end result of both of these episodes is that... The Animation Machine fails to make good art. The Machine, the AI, fails. It doesn't have what people have in making art-- It's just a soulless machine. And I think that's Mephones subconscious. He doesn't think he can make good art. Or at least, still remembers cobs discouraging words, and takes them to heart even still.

HE LITERALLY SAYS "A Machine can't make art" IM LOSING MY MIND HERE ACTUALLY. "But Mephone, you're a machine!" "My point exactly." IM SORRY!??!?! Okay maybe this digging was all for not it's actually RIGHT THERE spelled out for you, but nonetheless I like the subtle hints towards the end message. Mephone's pretty damn self-deprecating. And he believes he cant make good art. And that hurts me even more after the reveal, because he probably won't ever be able to make art again, not without considering the harm he's caused.

That hurts. Such a comforting thing to him in his youth becoming one of the things that reminds him of the harm he's caused and the harm thats been done to him. OUCH. OUCH!!!!! Sorry this was so long. I couldnt stop thinking about this and i needed to get it out AGHH -2G Anon

GAAAAAAHHGHDEHDXDJWDXJDWXS THIS IS SUUCH SUCH SCUH A GOOD DETAIL I DON’T THINK ANTONE HAS POINTED OUT YET. I’M GONNA KILL YOU (AND I MEAN THAT IN THE BEST MOST POSITIVE WAY IMAGINABLE)

BUUEUFUGHGH I DON’T WVEN WANNA SAY ANYTHING CAUSE I DON’T WANNA TAKE AWAY FROM THIS SUPER GOOD ANALYSIS. EVERYONE READ THIS ASK NOOOWWWWW!!! NOWWW!!!!

[kiyomitakada]

…actually. i just had a great idea

#surely one more couldnt hurt

1 note

🛻 man-withareason Follow

🌇 ecliipsedsun Follow

HOLY FUCK IT'S REAL???

🎸 baka-sussy Follow

ok but how do we even know if the second one is actually kira like,,, the first guy killed some japanese news announcers n shit, this other one hasnt done anything

🪼 moonlesschild Follow

It says very clearly in the article that the Kira who first broadcast the tapes admitted that they were looking for the original Kira. No matter whether the "other guy's" response is genuine or not, the Kira who killed the news announcers is not the same Kira as the one who started killing in December. Can y'all please learn how to read

🐙 teraphilia Follow

omfg @watashi-wa-seigi our 2kira1L rp is happening irl????

🔎 watashi-wa-seigi Follow

oh my GOD. THEY CAN ACTUALLY SPITROAST HIM NOW THIS IS THE BEST NEWS EVER

🐙 teraphilia

THREESOME THREESOME THREESOME

🛻 man-withareason

can you all not do this on my post

#if the heart attack powers can actually spread i hope i get them #i'll rid the world of annoying tumblr users

7,563 notes

content-free reblogged content-free

[pumpkinsy0]

I think people like Mark because they view him as another Dally (Proudly terrible and violent but actually desperate and spirals once they lose #their person) but as that other anon pointed out, Mark just does not have that charm that Dally has lol

When Dally snaps it's because the person who showed him that life and people can be beautiful just died this rendering life itself useless. When Mark snaps it's because his brother stops him from pushing drugs on innocent kids :$ I know the situation is more complex than that but like ugh Mark sucks so idc besides he gave off major narcissist vibes and him telling Bryon he'd stop selling drugs could've very much been a lie.

I will say it's interesting the parallel of how they both basically lost their sense of humanity but Mark could neverrrrrrr compare

i was gonna sit here and argue for y u dont see marks charm but like idgaf about mark enough to say it LMFAOOOO

but ok look before i start what i wanna say im saying this in the middle of a cramp and im feeling very nauseous so im very srry if u cant understand what i mean

BUT WHAT I WILL SAY IS, u can see their charm even when theyre being destructive, u can see at the end of the day what they truly do care about or if they care at all

for dallas, when he killed himself, he didnt hurt anybody (physically at least, emotionally is a different can of worms), the only person he WANTED to hurt was himself and thats bc what he loved, was destroyed. hell he didnt even hurt the cops and he hates authority figures😭😭 he totally couldve hit that storeclerk at any point but he didnt. towards the end of his life u cannot argue that he didnt care for his found family. dallys last words were ponys own name, dallys charm is that he secretly DOES care about the ppl around him

for mark, he made his problem that bryon was distancing himself from him, EVERYBODY elses problem and didnt care at all for who he hurt, he didnt care that he was hurting m&m, he didnt care that he would hurt kathy, he doesnt even care that hes hurting bryon. in tex its obvious hes still holding a grudge!! at the end of the day, mark doesnt care for anyone but himself, truly he doesnt, at some point he DID care but only for bryon, but it was conditional, when bryon went against what he wanted, he couldnt care less about him. marks charm was mostly fake, he was doing it to just gain an upper hand to get himself outta trouble, he doesnt have a genuine redeeming quality like dallas does

so thats y i NEVER understood y ppl view him as just another dally!!! they have similar endings, being just written off as another troublemaker and nothing more, but thats like saying bryon is just another ponyboy, but if i said that u would look at me crazy!!! while yes they share qualities, theyre their own characters its SO important to me that ppl dont just go in reading twttin for just a sequel for the outsiders, cause thats not what it is

i hope this made sense,,,,,pls tell me it did,,,,

but while we r here, mark is also kinda like two bit!!! mostly like dallas but i can see hints of two

[headvampd]

Yeah I am NAWT on Shiro's side here. He's low-key (highkey) hella disrespectful.

First off look at how excited Laios was to see his trifling ass, he genuinely thought Toshiro was his friend. He didn't even hold the fact that he left the group against him.

Then he proceeds to act like he's the one who cares the most about Falin but then acts like a self righteous prick when he finds out how exactly they saved her. Starving himself and bringing his entire little cadet from his house only to balk at an unconventional means being used to bring back the supposed "love of his life", saying he'll never understand why they did what they did like HE wasn't waxing poetic about Falin a couple panels ago. He is NAWT a real lover.

And yet Laios blames himself. Toshiro has always been calm and collected and dare I say Laios looks up to him, and he thinks that for him to be that pissed off, he surely must've done something wrong which is the only time as far as I've read we see Laios actually express any thought that perhaps what he did was wrong. It's obvious he holds Shiro's opinions in high esteem.

Laios has only treated Shiro with kindness and literally trusted him enough to tell them about their secret use of the dark arts and what does he do???? He proceeds to say that Laios isnt taking Falin seriously LIKE SHES NOT HIS DAMN FUCKING SISTER. Laios grew up with Falin, they've been together even before the adventuring, he's willing to risk everything for her and yet Shiro thinks he can have an opinion because he can't understand and hence doesn't like Laios's attitude??? We saw what Laios was willing to do to defeat the red dragon, they had already done that long before Shiro even showed up, what gives him the right to talk as if he knows Falin more than anyone of them??? What made him think say that was in any way okay???

And now let's even get in his distaste for Laios attitude. And maybe it's because I've been in Laios' situation so many times but you'll never catch me supporting anybody who depends on social cues to pass across the fact they don't like you, I hate it so fucking much. It's not Laios's responsibility that he couldnt say that shit to his face and yet despite finding out that someone he considered a friend actually finds him annoying, Laios simply asks why Toshiro didn't say something sooner which is the right question actually. And then he also admits he knows Laios doesn't actually mean anything bad by it and that's what makes it worse because everyone around him has to deal with him...

Honestly I won't lie that part actually hurt as someone who has had this scenario happen in different formats over and over and over again and has just learnt to isolate myself from people because of the almost irrational fear of doing the wrong things and saying the wrong things at the wrong times because of course people can't go one day without creating unspoken rules you have to follow to properly socialize. Toshiro is getting no sympathy from me.

In all of this my summary is: Toshiro is an annoying, privileged dickhead and he can suck my dick.

[fictionfixations]

this is the march event

*beep boop beep bop boop beep*

yes, hi, aven?? topaz? jade (...?) (yknow what its kinda crazy we know 3 stonehearts. i mean i dont think we know jade that well but man we have connections.)

can yall fire this dude. hes. genuinely so bad at his job. and gives the ipc a bad name. like seriously

is it legal to just bring mechs in a public area that are clearly very dangerous? he says its for his safety but i say its a threat. like theyre not doing anything but bruh its like he's walking around with some big ass gun out. or a chainsaw. like hello??? (idk if there are people in there but like. HELLO?? if they're bodyguards they dont need to be RIGHT THERE. because where were they before then??)

also oh my god

he doesnt want to look bad in front of clients. but that means his 'clients' are xianzhou people right?

and he just insulted xianzhou swordplay

also you literally got told to not do anything because street fighting is illegal, BY the. the the people in CHARGE OF the lAW

you ACKNOWLEDGE that there is a CLOUD KNIGHT right THERE

you were SPECIFICALLY WARNED

and

that doesnt sound very friendly does it

i swear theres genuinely like a law where youre not allowed to threaten people or something because it could be taken as.. something something???? ??? maybe im tripping and it was actually in regards to death threats but like ... d u d e why make excuses youre making urself sound so bad

are you dumb

im. genuinely so frustrated at thsi guy. i didnt think id still hate him BUT I DO oh my god. like. AT LEAST dont be an asshole where people who have the authority TO ARREST YOU ARE THERE like CMON???? HELLO??? at least make an attempt to pretend to be NOT THAT

let me get this straight

its ONE PERSON vs who knows how many mechs

i dont think thats fair. not to mention those mechs have probably been improved upon time and time again for years, meanwhile march will have only been improving for 15 days

also i have no fucking idea if there are people inside those mechs. b ut if there are. THEN THERE SHOULD ONLY BE ONE MECH FIGHTING HER. or its not fair. at all. not to mention its probably even more difficult because theres fuckin metal. armor. shit.

LMFAOOO HES NOT OVER IT. dude just let it go i feel embarrassed for you

PREACH

stop digging yourself into a deeper hole im begging you

no offense to the voice actor but genuinely its characters like these that i actually cant listen to their voice because i just. hate them. like the character NOT the va. because they're saying hurtful insulting things and im just like. if i want to actually read whats going on instead of skipping through it (as a person who has done it before and then stopped to read through the log) i genuinely have to mute because the way it infuriates me 😭 (the other time was like i think possessed fu xuan ? cant remember if that one was being super annoying or if i was just having a bad day and couldnt deal with it.)

anyway id like to think im partway through the wardance story so far but i have no idea. anyway i just realized i can do march event now. and also this is BEFORE wardance

and at the story im at like the day before the wardance so uhhh

i should be doing it cause its in order. also im procrastinating because im NOT ready to see everything that happened in the trailer because holy shit that was insane

ALSO because cutscenes keep lagging for me so its kinda irritating. theres videos already of just the cutscenes so im watching them from there because i genuinely cant tell wtf is happening since it freezes in game. which sucks cause i love watching cutscenes sfhdsuifhsf

[castlebyersafterdark]

What you wrote about giving blowjobs was just one of the most beautiful descriptions of that sex act I've ever read, and I've read a fair few sexology books.

The isolated point of focus? The strangeness of being physically close but also still kind of far away from them, from their face, their breath and expressions? It's not something that's discussed but I've always been fascinated with the physical spatiality of sex. Camera angles in porn and movies can also make lovers look oddly far away from each other, whereas it's not that far irl. it's like looking at your foot and thinking it's so far away from your body yet it's still part of you and controlled by you. I also think dicks have this energy - a hard dick is just there, it almost doesnt look like it can fit or belong to the body haha (see those steve + jeans gifs you posted - he is BUSTIN out of those pants hahaha it's obscene!)

i too want that magic for mike and will - imagine how will would feel when he looked up and saw that mike was not only allowing him to do this, but enjoying it? and thank you as well for talking about this because i definitely grew up thinking that giving a BJ was debasing and i would only ever be at the whim of the man, and that he might even do something that would hurt me because it felt good for him (happened to lots of friends) and i couldnt find a way to make that kind of submission gel with my values, so i've ended up avoiding giving BJs in general. reading fic and seeing headcanons like this makes me feel like it could be possible i would find a partner who is respectful and let's me 'go at my own pace' like you said. maybe its just because i can't believe i would ever be able to make anyone give me 'that expression' just by touching them.

vinny i genuinely thought your fav sex act would be the same as will's (🍑🍑🍑), so im surprised by this revelation! hehe

Oh geez, that makes me feel some sort of way, so thank you 😌 If you have a passion, speak from the heart I suppose 🤣🤣🤣

But jokes aside, it's the honest truth! What I hope I do here is give a little different sort of introspection and just a different viewpoint on this sort of stuff, because I just enjoy speaking freely and honestly, sure there's fun in the crude and silly, but I also think that bringing back a little romanticism to talking about sex just helps when the vibes too many places only treat it as a total joke or a taboo. Normalize. Get a little lofty. Embrace being passionate. Explore a fantasy. Look at things from different viewpoints. I'm a really, really sappy guy. I'm know I'm pretty different. And I like that.

Glad you enjoyed my vision for them, it's just so!!! Yeah. And everyone has different journeys. I've alluded to certain things about myself and your mindset and comfort levels and interests can change over time. Or you decide, hey, that's actually not for me. But at least thinking and considering things is good, no matter what. We're always learning and growing.

And we would think, right??? Hahaha. Definitely a big fan, but not quite the number one. I don't know, I can't explain it. Well, I totally can, but something about framing personal insight through the guise of fictional characters is one thing, but when i shift too specifically and too directly about myself, it feels overly graphic haha. But I uhhhhh. I really really love doing that. It is what it is. Live without shame I guess, that's what I've been trying to say 😘😉

[cactusringed]

I WAS SO OUT OF FOCUS I ENDED MY SCARDUBS RANT BAD HI ITS ME HI HI. THIS IS A PART 2 EVERYONE NEW TO THIS ASK READ PART ONE IF YOU WANT IDC I DONT CONTROL YOU ITS 5AM I HAVENT SLEPT

OKAY SO

BDUBS WAS FURIOUS WHEN HE AGREED TO ATTACK SCAR. HE HAD WANTED TO, HE WANTED IT TO HURT, HE KNEW HE COULD HURT

BUT I THINK THAT SEEING THE FEAR BETRAYAL HURT IN SCARS FACE AS HIS SWORD CUT THROUGH HIS SKIN CAUGHT HIM OFF GUARD. YEAH, HE WAS FURIOUS AT SCAR IN A WAY HE KNEW HE HAD NEVER BEEN BEFORE, BUT SEEING THAT LOOK ON SCARS FACE WASNT WHAT HE EXPECTED. THE WEIGHT OF WHAT HE WAS DOING TRULY SET ON HIS SHOULDERS AND HIS HEART BROKE.

WHEN HE SAW SCAR PULL BACK THE STRING OF THE BOW, SHAKING AND TREMBLING, HE UNDERSTOOD. SCAR HAD FORGOTTEN THE WEIGHT LIKE BDUBS MUST HAVE, BDUBS WAS SURPRISED TO SEE IT ACTUALLY HURT SCAR.

HE UNDERSTOOD THAT THIS IS AN AWFUL PLACE TO BE IN, WHEN YOURE SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS AND YOUR ACTIONS HAVE A WEIGHT YOURE NOT USED TO. A WEIGHT YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO BEGIN TO NAVIGATE OR HANDLE. THEY DID HORRIBLE THINGS BUT ITS THEIR SITUATION, NOT THEM. THEY CAN MOVE PAST IT

BDUBS *APOLOGISED*. HE TRIED TO FIX IT. FOR JUST A MOMENT, HIS ANGER WAS AT THE WORLD, NOT SCAR

BUT THEN SCAR BRUSHED OFF WHAT HE DID, WHILE BEING UPSET WITH WHAT BDUBS DID

HE WHINED AND WHINGED AND COMPLAINED ABOUT NO NO, **HE** DIDNT DO ANYTHING WRONG BUT BDUBS DID. IT WAS DURING A GAME BUT BDUBS WAS OUT OF NOWHERE

OUT OF NOWHERE????

A GAME THEY WERE WORKING TOGETHER IN. THEY WERE ALL GOING TO WIN WITH MINIMAL HARM. IT WASNT JUST OUT OF NOWHERE, IT WAS DURING A MOMENT OF HEARTFELT COMPASSION AND TRUST IN A TASK THAT WAS MEANT TO HURT THEM ALL

OUT OF NOWHERE????

SCAR WAS MAD AT HIM FOR RETALIATING AGAINST SCAR ***KILLING HIM***. IT COULDNT HAVE BEEN MORE THAN, WHAT, SEVEN HEARTS?

BDUBS DIDNT THINK HE WAS EVER ANGRIER. HE KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH ALL THAT ANGER. NOT WITH THE RESTRICTIONS, NOT WHEN HE WAS FULLY UNABLE TO DO ANYTHING TO HARM SCAR HOW SCAR HAD HARMED HIM. NOT WHEN THERE WAS NOTHING HE COULD DO TO HURT SCAR OVER AND OVER AND OVER UNTIL HE GOT IT THROUGH HIS THICK HEAD

NOT WHEN THEY HAD A TASK TO COMPLETE TOGETHER

YOU EVER HEARD OF SUPERHEATED WATER??? ITS WHEN THE WATER MOLECULES THEMSELVES GET HEATED IN THE MICROWAVE, INSTEAD OF THE CONTAINER. IT LEADS TO THE WATER BEING COMPLETELY STILL UNTIL SOMETHING BREAKS THE SURFACE TENSION. ONLY THEN DOES IT LOOK LIKE IT'S BOILING

THAT WAS BDUBS!!!!

BDUBS WAS DETERMINED TO PUT IT ASIDE FOR NOW, THEY HAD A CHALLENGE TO COMPLETE. AND UNLIKE SOMEONE, HE WAS A MAN OF HIS WORD. HE WAS GOING TO MAKE SURE ALL THREE OF THEM SUCCEEDED. HE WASNT GOING TO BETRAY THEM LIKE SCAR HAD HIM, EVEN AFTER SCAR ***KILLED HIM***

AND SCAR? SCAR JUST SAW STILL WATER. HE DIDNT SEE THE BOILING BUBBLING ANGER WHEN HE AND BDUBS WORKED TOGETHER ON THEIR TASK. WHEN BDUBS HELPED HIM COMPLETE IT HIMSELF, HE ASSUMED THAT MEANT ALL IS WELL

NOW TELL ME

TELL ME WHAT HAPPENS WHEN SOMETHING BREAKS THE SURFACE TENSION

Giggles part 1 here

Bro honestly the fact that Scar got mad at BDUBS for fair and square retaliating OHHHHHH god you're so right actually. I think bdubs would've probably let it go it bitterly if scar genuinely apologised and took it as them being even but saying bdubs HIT HIM OUT OF NOWHERE. OHHHHH

this is bdubs' season baby, Bdubs who always put himself in the side character's shoes learning to be the main character (killing the ender dragon), having OTHER PEOPLE work to get him to the top (pearl rooting for him) and now babygirl's holding grudges because he's LEARNED HIS WORTH BABYYYYY OUGHHHHHGHG I HOPE HE KILLS SCAR I HOPE NEXT SESSION SEES HIS RAGE GROW OHHHHHH I WANT THE SCARDUBS TO BE SO DRAMATIC. OH BABEY

[justtryingtogetmybrainright]

Had a very triggering S/A dream that kept starting over and over lastnight. I havent felt this unreal and like im outside my body in a minute. My brain feels… foggy.

One thing I can look forward to today is, working out. First day back in the gym in years. I’m excited to make this change to my body. I deserve to feel good about myself and have a feeling this will really help in doing that.

I’m going back to school in the fall. I feel this should help me feel good about myself as well.

I had to ask my dad a very serious question the other day. “You’ve known me my whole life. Answer me seriously. Do you think i’ve done nothing with my life ?” And he sort of scoffed as in he couldnt believe I asked it. And said “No.” and I said “Really? Even with how old I am, dont you think I should have a degree by now?” And he said “I also didn’t have a degree til my 30’s as well.”

I thanked him and told him I loved him. I walked back into my room and held back tears, only because I had just put make up on. And I went back out there, still having a small bit of doubt in my mind. I asked “And you’re not saying that because you’re trying to not hurt my feelings right? You genuinely believe I have done something with my life so far?” And he looked annoyed (because I obviously showed I didnt believe him) and he said “Yes. I believe you had.” I thanked him and told him that I just have been feeling this way about myself.

The thing is… I knew I have done something with my life. I’ve done many things. I’ve gone through so much and came out on top of it all. Not saying I’m fixed or completely healed. But I knew I had done the best for myself when I was able to move home, back to the place that completely broke me, where I broke myself. I was able to look at it head on and say to myself(and believe it)”I got this. I’ll be okay. Because I have every tool I need to be the best me I can be. I can get through nearly everything.”

Being a spiritual person has helped me in ways I can not imagine. That’s a subject that will definitely need a whole separate post. But these are my thoughts at the moment. Have a good day. If anyone reads this.

[arpiniko]

very much agreed. recently had to get an appointement with an orthopaedic doctor for some disability documentation.

i went to a local doc (in new city) with pretty good opinnions in the internet, he never met me nor heard about my health case, my surgeries or what is happening currently with me. and so i tried to tell him my story.

i tell him what it did for my health how after a bit of bone transplant from leg i had my foot disfigured. had few surgeries and how even now over 10 years later that leg is still constantly in pain. and hoped to have maybe a bit of insight as to what to do with it with a fresh look of a new doc. he didnt even take a look at my leg. well he said nothing should hurt me and if it does its imaginary. that i'm lying for attention and that i should not have a disability level that i tried to get. that in *his* opinnion i'm just a stupid kid who want to exploit system.

ummm no sir it hurts like hell and my leg gets swollen way too easy and i have troubles walking standing or carring anything heavier. he gave me a bullshit paper for my documentation (that didnt even mention my leg problems whatsoever. only hand mention) that i rather wipe my ass with with how usefull it is, and sent me home.

some time later i managed to get an appointment with different specialist in different city through connections. even tho this doctor was running between few surgeries to give me a bit of time outside of his schedule he throughoutly read my health history, took a good look at my leg. made an xray of it immidiately and wow surprise we found why it hurts like hell. after over 20years after transplant the bone never reconeccted and the two seperated parts degraded in such a way its now two pointy sharp as hell sticks in my leg piercing into my muscles with every move. fun.

doc was kinda terrified of how i can walk with seeing how sharp the bits were but he couldnt really find any solution at time, but he said he'll look into it and consult some other specialists in field. also he gave me an actual insightful document with full opinnion that i needed.

but was it difficult to just sent me to xray?? no. was it dificult to sit there with a patient on your work time as it was scheduled and listen to their problems? no. but the first guy nonetheless didnt bother while the second doctor did it all even outside of his schedule and tried his best and was genuinely sympathetic which really make a difference

as someone who has been in and out of hospitals for a while (surgeries, tests, check ups ect) - kind and gentle doctors, nurses and workers who dont mind clarifying, explaining, reassuring without annoyance, make or break the whole situation

[thelightsmiles]

wedesday morning

he's still asleep. i wasnt gonna get up yet. i was gonna sleep in on my weekend, like i always tell myself im gonna do bc i hate getting up early. its only 8am, and im glad im not waking up at 10 or something. i couldnt get his keyboard to work. he has this whole setup now, and i love it bc im totally gonna write more. im totally gonna make more art now.

we got a desk for the room. it reminds me of my old desk, at the house with all the memories. that was my little studio. i have so many memories in that desk. so many dark moments, too. but i like to look back at those years, i love to imagine myself back there, but i cant. its like i know i cant go back, but i just wish there was some way i could grasp it just enough to get those emotions i used to feel, to somehow be that person again for just a half of a second.

id like to think id be satisfied with half a second, but id probably hold on too tight if i found a way to do that, and never let go.

i had this little square of wood. im not sure what youd call it, what i used it for. it was my special block though, and i miss it. i miss how i used to create. so genuine and so easily. not always, but i let myself back then. i havnt let myself create like that in years.

its kinda funny, when i was 14 or 15 i would write these stories about how one day i got out of there, i escaped that stupid little town, i left and i never looked back, i created the life i wanted. in most of them, though, i just met someone and they saved me. they took me far away and i loved them forever. in most of them, if im being honest, tj came back.

he came back just like i fantasized about every night for months and then years. i dont remember when i fell out of love with him. it was longer than a year. i waited all that year, knowing he was gone but i couldnt handle it. i think i sent him an email once, and he probably didnt even log into his account, its probably sitting in there still.

id look at these pictures i had of him, and id think about how i could see us together in the future. i always thought about how hed be such an amazing dad. i wrote so many letters to him, i never sent them. i couldnt even give him that note id worked so hard on the day he left.

it took a really really long time for me to heal from that boy. and now that i dont idolize him, i cant imagine ever falling for someone that way again. i dont know how i could have, i didnt even know him. i think he was just the only boy whod ever given me some sort of hope that i wasnt unlikable.

so i did need that. i needed to learn all those lessons that taught me. i needed all those moments from that time period that ill never be able to remember.

all i know is i miss my childhood so much it hurts. id give almost anything to go back, and im not supposed to say that, bc i thought id let go of it ages ago, for the last time. i thought id accepted it was over and decided to finally live for that girl i used to be.

its kinda funny how all the little parts of our lives flow together so nicely when you look back, despite how incredibly different we were, how differnt the times were.

im still not sure when my depression was at its worst. there was one fall-summer that i wasnt there. i didnt exist. i dont remember myself.

id wake up at like 5pm and go out, id walk to the library and grab a random book, id go take my walk and sit by the water or stand on the bridge looking out at it. it was always so cold, but i dont remember being cold. i just remember the street lights, the snow, the music, the pain.

id get home and start reading, and then it would be 6am and id have finished that book, and i went to bed and cried myself to sleep, and then it would happen all over again.

[valberryelixier]

Pantalone headcanons

Credit to Chieu.tatami on twitter 💜💜

You and Pantalone were close, close enough to be on talking terms and occassional tea. Maybe you were wrong but you could read through him and his facade, his indifferent attitude and lust for money was but a mask. One to protect himself from things he considers unbeneficial.

But thoughts are not always true afterall, maybe these thoughts were what you wished. When you worked alongst him you started gaining feelings towards him. Of course, you knew it was impossible between him and his job something like romance would never work.

"Ms y/n, Lord Pantalone requests your presence", your assistant said. It snapped you back to reality, what were you even thinking?

You knocked on his office door, money was no problem for you but you certainly were far from equal to him in terms of moras. His office proved so, the grand entrance, a wooden door carved by the finest artist in inazuma, plated with gold and the handle made of pure gold. Not to mention the interior which was luxurious but not overwhelming. It surely showed off his wealth but it wasn't tacky, more so elegant. The intricate carvings on the ceiling and the murals on the windows were just a background that made his wooden desk shine.

His desk was neat, papers stacked accordingly and not a single thing out of place. His smile plastered on his face eternal, he stood up and greeted you, "Well, hello y/n it has certainly been a long time, how was fontaine? You certainly kept me waiting, not replying to my letters" he chuckled.

Arrogant, you thought, but you loved that about him. You stared at him, unintionally but everything about him seemed so intentional from his perfume that smelled woody and the coats he wore made of the finest materials.

"Cat got your tounge?"

Have you been staring too long? You didnt even realize. You couldnt hold this anymore, you needed to do something desperately. Your feelings were overflowing and passion burnt out from your heart. Its no lie that you love him, it wasn't just a crush it was truly love.

"Its hard to be around you when i like you and i know you dont feel the same way", you said meekly. Maybe you shouldnt have, what if it ruined everything you had. Or what if he thought of you as a fool.

"I know darling, don't mistake me for a fool, i see the way you look at me every time" he smiled, but it was a genuine one not just the cunning smile he put on display for business. He was a proud man, he thought he would never say it back so thats all he said.

"You may leave now, if thats all"

What? Was this all a game, a joke to entertain him? He was the one who called you, was this the reason? All sorts of questions rushed to your brain and you wanted to run out, anywhere but near him.

You walked towards the door slowly, hiding how hurt you felt, the fact that he barely acknowledged you and told you to go as if it meant nothing. But something stopped you, maybe he regretted it. Pantalone held your hand in a bruising grip right as you were about to touch the door handle, he stepped closer to you. Enough to feel his warm breath.

"What? You didnt think id let you go so easily wouldnt you?"

He caged you around his arms and helf your waist, he hesitated but soon lust overcame him, his lips nearing towards your own catching it into a deep passionate kiss.

"Open up", he demanded. You slowly opened your mouth to let his tounge explore your mouth. His tounge reached every corner of your mouth while his hands rubbed your hips. The kiss ended with the both of you gasping for air.

He smirked at you, his eyes full of passion still. "Lets continue this elsewhere shal we"

[demadogs]

2 things:

Argyle will be COMPLETELY stoned the entire season and he'll just think he's on the craziest *trip* that he's ever been on.

Now, can I ask do you like Mileven together or do you ship Byler? Or do you stay out of shipping? Or you don't care who's with who, as long as everyone is happy?

I think Will has a major crush on Mike. Mike loves Will. Like he truly loves Will but just in the general type of love, a platonic type of love. If Mike finds out that Will likes him as more than a friend, I think Mike will handle the situation well. He will try to let Will down easy and then be a supportive best friend, no shaming.

first of all the concept of argyle thinking he’s tripping the entire time is so fucking funny i love that so much.

second, yes i do ship byler and i genuinely do believe it’ll happen. at first after season two i just thought “aw theyd be cute together” but then season three came out and i saw how unhealthy mileven was and all the evidence people shared on here that leaned towards byler and i was like “oh shit theyre actually doing this”. i thought mileven was really cute in season one and when they reunited in season two but then when we saw them as an actual couple they were really rough. i do want every character to be happy but i dont think mileven is right now.

im gonna share the biggest things or evidence that totally convinced me byler is the direction the duffers are heading. this might be long. not trying to be like “YOU MUST SHIP BYLER AND HERES WHY” but you seem nice and open to either so id like to show you what sold me on byler and im curious to hear your opinions on it after you read this. there’s plenty of things that show wills feelings so i’ll focus on mike since you already believe will loves mike.

1. the break up scene vs the rain fight scene

this is the biggest one for me by far. i study film and every color pallet in scenes, every song they choose, even the weather is very much intentional!! the mileven break up is super saturated, in broad daylight, and has a very humorous tone. they couldve easily made this a heartbreaking scene but they chose not to. also theyre not alone its not a moment between just the two of them.

the rain fight on the other hand is the complete opposite. it’s very blue, theres harsh shadows, its pouring rain, and the mood is much more emotional and hurt and they’re alone.

looking at these stills next to each other even if you didnt have the context at all you would be able to tell which interaction is more emotional and means more to the characters.

also look at the difference in mikes face after el and will’s last word. for el he just looks annoyed and for will he looks so hurt.

last point on these two. look at the difference between el and wills reactions to these interactions. i know you said you do believe will loves mike but look at el’s reaction. she doesn’t love him as much as she thinks she does either. why would she be laughing and highfiving?

2. the way the last mileven kiss is framed!!!!

again with the film shit, THIS IS INTENTIONAL. look how mike is not only in a closet, but the door to the closet is perfectly dividing their kiss. this to me convinced me that mikes gay not bi or anything else. some people think he’s bi but they wouldnt have the closet perfectly divide them if he was bi bc that wouldnt be the reason for them breaking up. they could have angled this kiss so many ways if the door wasnt directly in the middle of them i mightve thought it was a coincidence but it is. also not to mention his eyes are wide open, he didnt kiss her back, and he couldnt say he loves her to her face. 

3. this tweet

i dont blame people who dont read into social media posts about byler. i normally dont but like come on why did they tweet this lmao there’s no other meaning to this than implying hes afraid of the idea of liking girls sexually.

those are the biggest things for me personally. theres lots of other shit with wills feelings but i just focused on mike. sorry that was kinda long but id love to hear what you think after this!

[tendouluvr]

not telling them you’re pregnant - f!reader

- fluff, sliiiight angst maybe

- characters: suna, sakusa, semi

- warnings: pregnancy (i don’t go into detail of giving birth or anything), cravings, morning sickness aka throwing up, two mention of the act of sex in semi’s, some cursing

- wc: 1.4k, 888, 946

a/n: it’s f!reader cuz pregnancy but there’s no specific pronouns/gendered terms used

also idk how suna got so long, he was the last one i wrote for bc i couldnt think of anything lmao

[2. iwaizumi, atsumu, kageyama]

SUNA

#! suna has been practicing late into the night the past few weeks

#! there’s a big game coming up and the entire team is feeling the pressure and adrenaline from the crunch time

#! you haven’t been feeling too good lately, a lot heavier and more tired than usual

#! thinking it was just stress from work and the missing presence of your boyfriend, you pushed through it and thought it would go away in the next few days

#! unfortunately, luck wasn’t on your side and you started to get sudden needs to throw up

#! it didn’t take you long to realize why your physical and mental drive have been down lately

#! you’re pregnant

#! or you believe you are

#! you bought a few tests, some of different brands so you can have a variety, and headed home to confirm your suspicion

#! a few minutes later, staring back at you was multiple positive symbols and the bolded ‘PREGNANT’s

#! taking a few deep breaths, you decided to tell suna tonight once he comes home

#! you thought it was better to let him know as soon as possible

#! it wouldn’t hurt anyone plus the faster you rip the bandaid off, the easier it’ll be to deal with it

#! so you waited

#! and waited

#! until 11pm that night, when suna finally came through the front door

#! “tarō! how was practice? can we talk?” you hurriedly greeted him

#! he was taken aback, not expecting you to be right beside him and in his ear as soon as he came in

#! of course you weren’t, you made sure to put some space in between you and him

#! but suna was stressed and tired, so everything is intensified to him at the moment

#! “can you back up?” he mumbled, pushing his way from in front of you to walk to the kitchen

#! “oh, sorry. can we talk?” you sheepishly smiled, hoping he would say yes

#! you’re not blind, you can tell that suna was tired but you really didn’t wanna put this off

#! you were just gonna tell him, he gets surprised, you both talk it out, and then go to bed and continue figuring things out tomorrow morning

#! but before any of that can happen, suna bluntly told you, “no. i’m tired. i’m sure whatever it is isn’t a big deal. can it be tomorrow? i wanna sleep.”

#! you didn’t get to answer before he was already walking away to the bedroom

#! understanding where he was coming from, you mentally agreed to talk to him tomorrow. one day wouldn’t change anything and you’ve seen plenty of people not tell their partners until a few weeks in

#! he was right, it wasn’t a big deal (yet)

#! so you waited until tomorrow

#! and waited

#! and once again, he came home late

#! “hey! can we quickly talk, babe?”

#! “i’m tired. tomorrow, okay?”

#! “oh, okay. night, rin!”

#! “g’night.”

#! night came and there was still no talk

#! this continued on for about 2 weeks, you finally choosing to not care anymore and just let him find out whenever he finds out

#! technically, you could’ve just blurted out a simple, “i’m pregnant.” any point during your nightly five seconds conversations

#! but seeing that he really was tired, springing it onto him would either put him in a full body shock for three days or he just doesn’t fully process your words until three days after

#! a month has passed, your stomach was still barely showing like most women at their one month mark

#! you decided to book an appointment for a checkup, it’ll be while suna’s at practice

#! and that doctor appointment was the exact reason suna found out

#! he was at practice when komori entered the gym

#! he had a doctor’s appointment for his annual checkup, and that’s where he saw you

#! you didn’t see komori, busy reading the directory to find your way to the right office

#! but he saw you on the way out. seeing that you looked a bit busy, he chose not to greet you and just quickly walk to his car lmao why is this funny to me

#! entering the gym, he greeted everyone and apologized for his tardiness even though it was excused

#! walking up to suna, he tapped him on the shoulder and quietly told him, “i saw yn at the hospital earlier. it’s been awhile since we all got together huh, they looked a bit different.”

#! ok so komori, being the smart person he is, deducted that you were pregnant when he saw your finger pointing at the ob/gyn office

#! and he genuinely thought suna knew so his comment was suppose to be a small joke that was meant to tease suna and his sex life

#! suna, however, was confused

#! look different? did you get surgery?

#! “what do you mean?”

#! komori rolled his eyes and gave a sweet smile at suna, “congrats you two! when were you gonna tell the rest of us?”

#! suna: 👨‍🦲 huh

#! “are you guys not pregnant?” he blinked at suna’s frozen reaction

#! suna became unresponsive so komori just walked away mumbling to himself about being sure he read the sign right

#! a loud whistle blew and it shook suna out of his daze, everyone got ready to play a practice game of 3 vs 3 while suna ran over to the coach

#! “hey coach, um i think there’s an emergency at home. can i go? ok thanks.”

#! his coach just stares after him as he sprints off, you think? is there an emergency or not?

#! suna quickly drove home, he may or may not have speed a little, and entered the apartment

#! “yn? baby?” he called out only to be greeted back with silence

#! probably still at the hospital....what were you doing there? he thought to himself while rummaging around the house to find anything that could give him somewhat of an idea

#! he was digging around in the bedroom when you came home, his head so frenzied he didn’t hear the front door open

#! but you heard the ruckus from the bedroom and immediately went into fight or flight

#! panicking, you took out your phone to call suna while quietly opening the front door to make your way back out before the intruder catches you

#! the phone rang and rang until it was picked up. “suna?” you whisper-yelled into the speaker. you had a habit of calling him by his last name when you were freaking out. he noticed and was equally alarmed

#! “what’s wrong?” he whispered back just as panicked

#! “there’s someone in our apartment. can you come home?”

#! “huh? oh, are you home?” he cackles into the phone speaker making you move the phone away from your ear, “it’s me, sweets, c’mere.”

#! you warily walked on your tiptoes over to your bedroom, peeking your head in and what a surprise, it is suna

#! “jackass! why are you home?!”

#! “why didn’t you tell me?” he cut straight to the point

#! “huh?”

#! “you’re pregnant. when were you gonna tell me?” his voice sounding stern, but the quiet smile dancing on his face tells a different story

#! “i tried.”

#! “huh? what do you mean?”

#! “all those times i asked if we could talk. i was trying to tell you.”

#! his heart dropped, eyebrows furrowing, while he stared you down

#! suna became unresponsive once again, standing there trying to think back to the first time you asked him

#! two weeks ago

#! “i’m sorry,” he quietly whispers

#! “hm? i..it’s fine....i was a bit sad, but i’m over it. at least you know now,” you casually shrugged it off like it wasn’t a big deal

#! “no. i shouldn’t have pushed you aside like that. even if you weren’t pregnant, even if you had just wanted to tell me about some stupid video you saw that day, i shouldn’t have told you off. i’m sorry, i love you a lot and you deserve so much better.”

#! “tarō, shut up. i accept your apology and i forgive you, now make it up to me by giving me a back massage while i show you the ultrasound pictures!”

#! he kisses you before lifting you up bridal style making his way to the bed

SAKUSA

#! contrary to popular beliefs, sakusa is not an obsessive germaphobe who finds everything disgusting but you

#! he wouldn’t be playing volleyball if he was that afraid of germs,,,,,

#! yes, he cringes if random little kids grab onto him after games because 1) he’s drenched in sweat and that feeling is not fun

#! 2) he doesn’t even know themmm

#! and 3) he wanna go home

#! but sakusa loves you and if you happened to get pregnant, he would love your kid(s) just the same

#! however, he never told you this. he never really had a reason to voice this out loud

#! so when you actually did get pregnant, you were confused

#! the only interactions between sakusa and kids you’ve seen multiple times were the moments between him and his fans

#! you guys have been to family parties and his nieces, nephews, and cousins looooves him

#! maybe it’s the fact that he’s a tall looming giant and they just want to climb

#! but besides those moments, you don’t recall him ever telling you upfront that he wants children of his own

#! and the constant stress and pressure he always seem to be working around also doesn’t help reassure you in any way

#! being an athlete for a living means always watching your body, health, and looks for the cameras (but omi could care less about the last thing)

#! he also has to make sure whether or not he’s working well with his teammates, practice and improve on anything he’s having problems with, and deal with atsumu’s dramatic ass

#! you’re an overthinker and because of that, all of these reasons were just reasons for you to postpone the pregnancy news to your long term boyfriend

#! it wasn’t too hard anyway, considering practice runs late sometimes and he’s busy majority of the time doing other stuff

#! when you guys do have alone time together, you both are so focused on one another that you actually forget that you’re pregnant and you never told him

#! you’re about to hit the three months mark now — time goes by fast — and sakusa has noticed you and your body changing

#! at first he just thought you were going through a phase of cravings and a bit of bloating, so he didn’t mention it and just let you be

#! he never got to witness you getting morning sickness because he goes on early runs or he was just out doing morning errands so he wouldn’t have to deal with it later that day

#! so when he caught you in the kitchen cutting up a lemon, the last thing he was expecting you to do was bring the lemon directly up to your mouth

#! “uh, what are you doing?” his deep voice caught you off guard, effectively stopping the hand that was holding the lemon

#! you just stare at him, not wide-eyed, not surprised, just stare

#! “eating a lemon.”

#! “i can see that.... why exactly?”

#! “dunno, the baby i guess.” you casually shrugged it off before popping the lemon slice into your mouth

#! “ah-,” he opened his mouth to stop you from eating the lemon, your words not fully processing in his mind, but cut off midway and froze when he finally realized

#! hearing him pause like that made you suddenly remembered that you never told him you were pregnant

#! you slowly turned back to look at him, mouth still slowly chewing the lemon slices

#! a moment of silence later, he unfreezes and just starts stiffly walking towards you

#! he grabbed you by the shoulders, made you look him in the eyes, before whispering, “you’re pregnant?!”

#! “y-yes..”

#! his eyes were wide, black pupils expanding as he stared you down, his lips slowly curving into a small smile

#! “you’re pregnant....,” he whispers, mainly to himself, hugging your head into his chest

#! “mhm, get off me i’m trying to eat,” you gently pushed him off but he wouldn’t budge

#! “omiiii please, if you get off i’ll give you a slice,” you tried bribing him. he couldn’t tell if you were being serious or just teasing

#! “no.”

#! “um ok, two slices?”

#! “no.”

#! “omi!”

#! he giggles before opening his arms to let you go

#! “why didn’t you tell me?”

#! you didn’t reply right away, making him start to overthink

#! did you not want the baby? or did you not want a kid with him? did you not want to be with him anymore? or was it not his?!

#! he childishly shakes his head side to side at the last question. he knew you wouldn’t do that

#! but you were still silent, making him nervously glance at you from the side

#! “sorry, piece of lemon stuck in my teeth. i just forgot to tell you,” the words easily flowing out of your mouth nonchalantly

#! sakusa’s fingers were literally about to start twitching from anxiousness beside you

#! a sigh of relief was heard from him and you turned to look at him

#! “you okay?”

#! he doesn’t answer, just gives you a smile and goes back to hugging you from behind

SEMI

#! you were currently sitting on the couch in your shared apartment waiting for semi to come home

#! he’s been on tour for a few months now, you both kept in touch by facetiming, texting, calling, and any other methods of virtual communication

#! you would tune into the live recording of all of his performances when you had time so you could watch him

#! a few weeks into tour, you suddenly felt different than usual but shook it off as nothing and probably just you missing your boyfriend

#! you believed that until one morning you were woken up by the sudden urge to throw up, dashing to the restroom as fast as your drowsy body can go

#! it was then that you realized you might be pregnant

#! the night before semi left, you both had sex to enjoy your last few hours together before he had to leave for a few months

#! with the new realization, you quickly dressed yourself to make a short trip to the store to pick up some tests

#! after half an hour of looking at yourself in the mirror, trying to wrap your head around this, you finally opened the first box

#! a few minutes later, all 5 tests were lined up on the bathroom counter showing positive

#! you stared at the tests, trying to make sure you weren’t reading it wrong

#! once you began to understand the responsibility of being pregnant a few hours later, you made a mental note to go out and buy some food for yourself the next day

#! you decided to sleep off the rest of that day

#! through all of the facetime calls with semi, you never once told him you were pregnant

#! you knew that if you told him he would freak out and either demand to go back home, or stay but all of his attention would be on you being pregnant alone at home for the rest of the tour

#! so here you are now, sitting with a 4 1/2 months baby bump waiting for your beloved to come home

#! it was around 6pm when the front door opened, sounds of shuffling bags and heavy steps could be heard from the musician

#! he cursed under his breath when he almost tripped over a duffle bag with some of his loungewear, calling out for you as he walks further into the apartment, “baby? i’m home!”

#! he was about to speak up again when he saw you asleep on the couch

#! bouncing his way over, he got onto his knees at the edge of the couch to observe your face. god i miss you, he thought to himself

#! he gently shakes you awake, you jolted in surprise not knowing you fell asleep in the first place

#! “hmm- what?,” soft murmurs falling from your lips as you adjusted your eyes at your surrounding

#! “eita!” he grinned at you, both of you pulling each other into a hug

#! “fuck, i miss you so much.” he whispered into your ears before placing his face into your neck

#! “i miss you more.” you tightened your grip around him making him move up on the couch to get more comfortable

#! you both moved around until he had you cradled in between him, your back against his chest

#! his hands going under your his shirt to caress you there when his movements stopped right on top of your stomach

#! it was silent as his warm hands rubbed your stomach in circles, the gears turning in his head

#! “are you- you feel- why’s your tum so round and hard?” he quizzically asked, still rubbing your stomach

#! “pregnant.” your voice a low whisper, he almost didn’t catch it

#! “what?”

#! “pregnant.” you repeated, a bit louder this time

#! “huh?”

#! “pregnant!” you sighed, moving his hand so you can get off of him

#! he grabs your wrist to stop you from walking away and turns you to look at him

#! “you’re pregnant?!”

#! “i just said that. yes.”

#! you knew you sounded blunt and a bit mean, it wasn’t his fault he doesn’t know at all, but your hormones have been making you crankier and it’s out of your control

#! “sorry. yes, i’m pregnant.”

#! his eyes continuously darts up and down from your eyes to your bump

#! “how long?”

#! “since you left.”

#! “was it the night before?” he was referring to your act of intimacy the night before he left

#! “yea.”

#! “wow. why didn’t you tell me?”

#! “because.”

#! “‘cuz what?”

#! “because i know you. you would either stop touring and come home, or stay but lose focus. i was just trying to not distract you because i know how important your career is to you. and because i thought that you’ll be having a six months break after this tour before your next comeback, i would tell you when you came home. i’m sorry if you’re ma-,”

#! “i’m not mad. oh don’t cry, babe, look at me.”he carefully cups your face, “it’s okay, it’s okay. i get why you kept it from me. and now that i have no schedule for the next six months, i can be there for you until the end of your pregnancy and the beginning of our baby’s life alright?”

#! you weakly nodded against his palms, and he brings you back down to lay your head on his chest as you both softly talk about the past months without each other